Thursday, May 05, 2005, 1:41 PM
Love,Life,Lies and Les.
Been having quite a few people popping into my life.At clubs.In Bangkok.Even on the train!There's the first boyfriend who's attached already.Then there was *His attached friend.Tues night,I was going home with myotherhalf from town.spotted this guy in the train.what a coincidence.we got off at the same station.Then he said Hi as we stood next to each other on the escalator.Talked fer awhile & exchanged no.s. Definitely not my usual way of knowing people but yeah.He was quite cute.Otherwise,I would NEVER have done so.Kinda an ego boost.I checked him out on friendster & found out he's in a relationship!Jerk!!!!I stopped replying his msges.Last night,I danced with the very first girl I liked.She was attached then and flirtatious too.Now,she's single.Also, *she whom I met in Bangkok.*She just ended a long term relationship.Is she on the rebound so fast??We only started to get closer now after so many years of "Hi"s and "Byes".I'm getting confused bout my bisexuality.Cos I could go many ways.I can like a guy.I can like a butch.I can like androgynous people.I can like hot lipstick lesbians.Whatever's likeable.Too much L Word?!Haha.I'm becoming more like the character I hate - Jenny.dammit.THAT'S irritating the shit out of me.Why is it that people who are attached can still try to come onto you?Okay,maybe I did do that too when I'm attached.But I no longer practise that.So everyone's out to have fun?Or do I come on as the fling fling sort?I hope not.Cos I believe I've been sending out the "fug off" signals very clearly.U know.Some clicks hafta be so evil.Really,just the girl clicks.So two-faced.So bitchy.So back-stabbing.So scandalous.So competitive.Gettin' all Jealous & Emo.So maybe there are some things you don't like bout your friends.Still.Its a very hurting thing to do.Very uncalled for.Then when hanging out together,you go Ooohs.Ahhhs.Screams.Shrieks.Hugs.Act oh so cosy and gettin' along just fineee.A lot of clicks do that too.Maybe that's the practice nowadays.I guess if you really want to count them as friends,I'd say birds in the same feathers flock together. I won't deny the fact I can be a hypocrite.Cos this I chose this way to get around.
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